Labels

Why is it that as a women, you get pegged a tom-boy or a girly girl.  This distinction gets assigned to you at a very early age and I don’t see why you can’t be both.  Most of the women I know and respect could easily fall into either camp at any moment.

I was at a party this weekend with three other couples and their kids, but Kevin could join me, so I was flying solo.  The A’s game was on.  I wanted to watch it which was shocking to all the men.  I like sports.  I like baseball.  I like football.  When I watch sports I like to drink beer.  Does that make me a tom-boy?

I take my coffee black, my drink of choice is tequila-soda and I am pretty sure there isn’t anything I can’t do.  Based on this I am a tough girl, right?

I also like pedicures, chick-flicks and cry every week when I watch Parenthood.  I love the way I feel when I put on a hot dress with four inch heels.  So I must be a girly?

This got me thinking about my sorority sisters.  If we are in a sorority we MUST be girly?  Except one of my sisters does triathlons (yes multiple), can drink most men under the table and manages to be an awesome mom while also traveling extensively for her job in a male dominated field.  I have sisters that are in the military, who are doctors and lawyers.  Very smart, strong confident women.  Then I remember how we all crammed ourselves in the bathroom to get ready for formal recruitment or how we popped a dozen bags of popcorn to watch Friends in the downstairs basement, or rocked out to Madonna during Spring Formal.  You all know who are and I love you!

We work hard, play sports and get sweaty.  We wear lipstick, skirts and stilettos.  Don't label us.  

Transformer

I can honestly say that Cara hasn’t changed much since she was born.  Sure, she is a LOT bigger, has a much larger vocabulary and can “do the Mickey Motion,” but her personality hasn’t changed much.  She has always been very expressive and silly.  She is stubborn and determined.  For better or worse she is loud, bossy and particular and I love all these things about her.  After all, she is my mini me J

Bri on the other hand has undergone huge personality transformations.  Just when I think I have got her pegged, she goes and does something unexpected.  Maybe that is her thing, to be unexpected.  When she was an infant she was quiet, still and observant.  She smiled a lot, but seldom laughed.  You got the impressions she was just taking everything in and quietly processing.

When she reached about six months, that all changed.  She was busy, very busy, too busy to be cuddled.  She was always moving.  This change was followed closely by an explosion of language.   At no point was I ever worried about her language development, but she certainly wasn’t the chatty Cathy Cara was at the same ages.  Suddenly she was racing around the house and carrying on about something or another.  Occasionally she would circle around for a drive-by hug, but anything beyond a momentary squeeze and I had a wiggle worm on my hands.  There were no weekend morning snuggles, if she was up she was moving.

I had come to expect this bustle of movement from her, that is until recently.  Just as suddenly as she took off, she slowed down.  Ironically it coincided with when she started walking which to me seemed a little counter-intuitive.  She is going through her separation anxiety phase and that is probably driving some of the recent change.  Now she wants to be held all the time, she will snuggle with me some mornings after her bottle.  She follows me around the house and sits or stands at my feet waiting to be picked up.  And when I do pick her up, her little body just melts into mine in a way that I can only describe as happiness.  I love it.

I expect she will continue to change when she realizes I am not the center of her universe, but until then I will relish the snuggles and peaceful time I have with her and appreciate the little girl she is growing up to be.